Thursday, March 30, 2006

Angels and demons and questions throughout

I have a guardian angel. Or spirit guides, or whatever you want to believe...all I know is that I have been in some dangerous situations where I was protected, and I have missed accidents several times. Like the time I was leaving my then boyfriend's house, and when the light turned green, rather than race out of the gate per usual....for some reason I hesitated. That's when a car in crosswise traffic ran a red light. Hmmm.

Tuesday, I couldn't remember where I had put my keys. I readily remembered on Wednesday, but on Tuesday I drew a blank, so I drove to work with my spare set of car keys. Usually, when I work a closing shift, my habit is to check my post office box before heading home. Because I didn't have my key, I turned the other direction and came home. One of my co-workers was driving the street and direction I habitually drive, and he was killed by a drunk driver who hydroplaned into his lane. Ramon was a bright light--always a smile on his face. Always a joke to tell or a way to make people laugh. One of my manager's said, "you know, I'll be lucky if I just touch a handful of people, but Ramon touched so many people". Work was in a state of shock yesterday, with people crying, contemplating, questioning why. Another of my co-workers was driving behind Ramon and saw the accident take place. He was the one calling 911 with one hand while nudging Ramon with the other. I saw him talking to an EAP (employee assistance) representative later.

I mean, what if Ramon would have stayed one more minute to talk to someone? What if he wouldn't have stayed one minute to talk to someone? All the miniscule steps of the evening that brought him to that place at that time that put him in the line of danger. Was it God's intention? One never really understands. I know that when I am delayed for some reason (maybe in a line at a store, or something similar) I tend to think that perhaps it's calculated to keep me safe. Like I said, there are so many questions, what-ifs, and unknowns.

You've heard all the cliches about life being short. But really, it can all be gone in a flash. No warning. No time to tell people you love them.
Live life without blinders on versus just skimming the surface.
Meet people.
Don't be afraid to have a conversation.
Make your life mean something to other people.
This is your chance.


Blogger my house is cuter than yours said...

barb, this is soo sad but really you are right about living life to it's fullest...we should all heed this advice.

8:52 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

What a powerful post. I'm so sorry to hear about your co-worker. Thank you for reminding us to enjoy every moment we have here on earth.

9:36 PM  
Blogger The Calico Cat said...

WOW - definately something to ponder. You should share your thoughts with Ramon's family...

3:59 AM  
Anonymous jellisy said...

Barb, I just forwarded this on to my son. We all need to be reminded to live each day to the fullest. Thank you for all the efforts you put into your blogs--I check them everyday. (I owe you an email--will write soon.)

7:00 AM  
Blogger African Kelli said...

Such a good reminder. I am sorry to read of your loss. I hope you are doing okay. (And thanking the heavens for guardian angels!)

9:37 AM  
Anonymous aubrey1872 said...

And continue to write!

It's difficult to forget your experiences and feelings once they've been written down. It's one of the most efficient methods of self-preservation that I know of. Forgetting is a terrible thing.

5:37 PM  
Anonymous Sandra said...

I'm so distressed and sad to hear about your co-worker. Thanks for reminding the rest of us to live every moment to the fullest, sometimes we forget. You definitely have a guardian angel or "friends in high (invisible) places" as my mom used to say...

3:18 PM  
Blogger Goat said...

All I can offer is my prayers in Christ's name. We lost our boss a week ago so I can empathize what you are feeling. If you want an impartial Christian voice to talk to, you know where you can find me.

9:30 PM  
Anonymous Celia said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very powerful post, one that I will be sharing with my friends.

- Aaron

Sewing Style

9:48 PM  
Anonymous gino carpio said...

Wow.. .very nice entry!
keep writing. and more power,

MumCentre - Singapore

8:22 PM  

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