Wednesday, September 26, 2007

"Suffering is intimately connected to wholeness." (page 114)

I'm a firm believer in being honest--both with yourself, and with others.
Meaning to show yourself in true form.
Putting yourself out there to the world and to others is an act of faith,
but a worthwhile one.

Several bloggers opt to only talk about happy subjects on their blogs.
That's their prerogative, of course, but I don't find it genuine.
Like I used to tell an ex-boyfriend, this isn't the Comedy Channel.
There are ups and downs, sadness and joy, anger and calm...
and it's all our experiences, our realities...
and our growth.

ALL of it.

It really is true that struggles and obstacles build character and showcase integrity.

That being said, I want to offer up a few words of wisdom
(from Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, and her lovely book,
Kitchen Table Wisdom).
These words are spoken to a certain someone, but placed here because you all might enjoy and benefit.
Because it really is okay to say you're afraid, or confused, or lost.
Because it's okay to express your vulnerabilities.

"Often times of crisis are times of discovery, periods when we cannot maintain our old ways of doing things and enter into a steep learning curve. Sometimes it takes crisis to initiate growth." (page 110).

"Avoiding pain, we may linger in the vicinity of our wounds, sometimes for many years, gathering the courage to experience them." (page 77)

"Those who don't love themselves as they are rarely love life as it is either. Most people have come to prefer certain of life's experiences and deny and reject others, unaware of the value of the hidden things that may come wrapped in plain or even ugly paper. In avoiding all pain and seeking comfort at all cost, we may be left without intimacy or compassion; in rejecting change and risk we often cheat ourselves of the quest; in denying our suffering we may never know our strength or our greatness. Or even that the love we have been given can be trusted.

It is natural, even instinctive to prefer comfort to pain, the familiar to the unknown. But sometimes our instincts are not wise. Life usually offers us far more than our biases and preferences will allow us to have. Beyond comfort lie grace, mystery, and adventure. We may need to let go of our beliefs and ideas about life in order to have life.
(page 75)

And this, according to Talmudic teaching, "we do not see things as they are. We see them as we are." (page 77)



Blogger Pattie - Chicagoland, IL said...

I have read, bookmarked, and ultimately unbookmarked many blogs over the years. Those I keep, such as this one, reflect a sense of reality that I can relate to every day.

The blogs with kids who never get dirty, fight or are mean to each other make me uneasy. The picture perfect lives some portray don't keep my interest.

Give me the hard work, the grime of every day living and you will retain me as a reader for a long, long time.

12:47 PM  
Blogger Heidi said...

I love that book! Our women's spirituality group read it years ago.

I also appreciate honesty in a blog. All happiness is fun, but seems fake after awhile.

7:09 PM  
Blogger Suesjoy said...

Oh Barb I can see this book will REALLY help me.
I can't wait to read it.
Oh for too many years I haven't loved myself, and always numbed my pain (in many ways). I often looked for the easy way out.
Not so anymore...I can't help but grow through this brain surgery experience.
It's not easy, but the silver lining has been the incredible outpouring of love and support from friends, family and so many people I have never met (bloggers). I have had many moments of feeling ONE with the world and the Divine.

10:20 PM  

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